Obviously, any pair that embarks on a journey together, from friends to couples will grow a bond that is undeniably stronger from when you began. The things you encounter in Thailand alone, are just sometimes unexplainable to the western world. These memories and moments are things you will share with your partner for life.
Living and teaching abroad as a couple can be a unique and rewarding experience that is sure to bring you both closer together and teach you things about each other you never knew you needed to know.
That being said, an adventure of this sort definitely comes with a set of challenges that may test your relationship in ways you never anticipated. However, the rewards can be great when you learn how to roll with the punches and find creative ways to deal with the different issues you may be faced with as you begin life with your partner in a new country.
This blog will feature stories from the perspective of three different couples who decided to embark on this journey and take the leap towards a life changing adventure that shaped their lives forever.
Beth and Mike
Mike and I met each other in Nelson, New Zealand. We were both staying at the same hostel and our friendship just never stopped growing! That was almost 9 years ago.
After returning to Canada, we battled a long-distance relationship for a while, all whilst knowing we wanted to be together but didn’t want the cookie cutter lifestyle that we were feeling pressured to follow at home. I had explored the idea of teaching overseas for sometime and once I shared this with Mike, he was sold.
We quickly realized after being placed in Amphawa, Thailand, the lack of English speaking connections was causing a lot of pressure at home to “entertain” each other. We really needed to find things that we could do on our own that the other could support yet not necessarily take part in. We had to be mindful of each other’s journey…
It took a month or two for us to find the roles we needed to play in each other’s lives here, as they differ greatly from the norms of home. Living with your partner is one thing, but adding in school and after hours with the same person everyday brings forth new challenges.
Obviously, any pair that embarks on a journey together, from friends to couples will grow a bond that is undeniably stronger from when you began. The things you encounter in Thailand alone, are just sometimes unexplainable to the western world. These memories and moments are things you will share with your partner for life.
Mike and I have grown tremendously as a couple. We are both so much more aware of our own, and each other’s needs. Being secluded with someone you love in an unfamiliar land brings a sense of terrifying adventure. It can go either way – crash and burn or hit some turbulence and keep going. There isn’t a smooth sail and we know that. We are both so proud of one another for overcoming so much already and are excited to continue growing as teachers and as individuals! We love XploreAsia and all the opportunities it has provided us!
Enrico and Philippa
We both attended the same farewell back in 2012. I went there with another girl, one of Philippa’s close friends actually and had no idea whose bash I was attending. We sat across from each other and spoke every now and again.
A couple of days later, I found her on Twitter and sent her a private message. We chatted during a hectic exam period and then met up after that for a drink and the rest is history.
We had hit a rough patch and felt like things were stagnating on both an individual and collective basis. We were both unhappy with life in South-Africa and after successfully travelling together the year before, we were unsettled in our birthplace. We spoke about moving abroad from the moment we got home the previous year and the topic simply did not fade away.
After this feeling continued for well over a year, we knew we needed a change, but something completely different. Not the typical move to London like every other 20-something South-African does, something and somewhere that was uncharted by our circle of friends and colleagues in order for it to be just the two of us. After some initial discussion, we settled on Thailand.
If I had to offer any advice to a couple considering moving abroad I would say…. It is so cliché, but take the plunge. It doesn’t matter what state your relationship currently is in; happy or going through a rough patch, this experience is unbelievably refreshing for one’s soul and sharing it with the person you love makes it even more special. The love you’ll receive from the Thai people -your students especially- is so overwhelmingly amazing. It’s unconditional nature is like nothing you’ve ever likely to have experienced before. Your relationship will also reach new heights, it’s almost as if you’re reliving that honeymoon phase when you were new lovebirds.
You’re likely to face the same issues as those who come here on their own such as the initial steps in making the decision to move abroad, homesickness and tough days at the office. From my experience being here with a partner makes each problem significantly smaller and easier to deal with.
This path we have taken with XploreAsia has helped us get back to where we were before, when our relationship was healthy. From the airport pickup to the activities during the orientation week to eventually becoming actual teachers and living life to its full potential, have all been part of a process that has helped us find more meaning to life. It hasn’t been about discovering ourselves, but rather a path of rediscovery.
This experience has made us unconditionally happy with the beauty that comes from living a simple life outside your comfort zone. We’re so grateful that XploreAsia held our hand back onto this path and are always a little behind us for a nudge in the right direction should we need one.
Emilie and Melvin
We met each other in college at a mutual friend’s birthday dinner. We hit it off the night we met and have been inseparable ever since!
Our community has been very supportive of our relationship. Both our friends and family were very excited when we first started seeing each other, and I believe their support and love have been growing ever since.
But as for Thailand, it has been an interesting experience. Not to say that it is a norm, but it is more common to find a farang (foreign) male and a Thai female. We happen to resemble the opposite. Since I look Thai, many Thailand natives give us strange looks or stare when they see us together.
We have definitely learned a lot of new things about each other. When you get two people moving across the world completely out of their comfort zone, there are going to be uncomfortable moments and we learn what really makes each of us feel uncomfortable and how to help each other through it to become a stronger person. Melvin definitely has too much energy in the mornings when getting ready for school.
The biggest challenge is not always knowing what to say to the other when they are feeling down or or just homesick. You want to comfort the other but sometimes just being sad or feeling a little down is just part of life and it means you’re human. And we know that those negative feelings will pass. Normally, one of us just needs food or a nap.
Cultivating a relationship in a “safe” or normal environment where everyone is just comfortable is, in my opinion, not the best way to build a relationship. Life has a way of throwing curve balls and making things difficult. Working together to get through rough patches and challenging situations really becomes a testament to the strength of the relationship. We didn’t embark on this journey to test our relationship, but as a way to strengthen our bond, knowing that after this, we can make it through anything. But we didn’t get into this to be in seclusion from everyone else! My suggestion is don’t just always spend time with just your significant other. Still go out there together and make friends! The friends we have made during this experience have been one of the best parts of this whole journey.
Although this journey has had its challenges, it has all been worth it. Irreplaceable memories created on the other side of the globe in a once-in-a-lifetime opportunity.
All You Need is Love..
But a Little Help From XploreAsia Doesn’t Hurt!
Connections can form quickly when embarking on an unknown adventure, spending hours lesson planning and learning to be teachers. Other times bonds form during long bus rides, spontaneous adventures or even just at a local bar. Meet just some of our couples who happened to do just that and fall in love while teaching in Thailand.
Avery and Cole
Cole and I met outside of the Hua Hin mall on the first day of our XploreAsia TESOL course in June, 2015. I had just graduated and he had recently decided that there was more to life than a desk job. Our conversations throughout the course made me feel like home wasn’t halfway around the world and we kept in touch once we moved to our respective placements. We traded stories and words of encouragement with each other. After traveling to Cambodia with mutual friends, we decided to be placed together for the next semester. Fast forward through our teaching adventures in Nakhon Nayok, volunteering in Nepal, and romping around Asia to this fall when we moved to Spain. Here, we’re continuing to teach English, navigate the wonders of a new culture, and yearn for more khao soi together. Thank you, XploreAsia for all your help and support!
Amy and Sean
In September 2015, I arrived in Thailand with one of my best friends to do the XploreAsia TESOL course. The plan was to teach for a semester or two and travel as much as we could in that time before heading back home to Canada. Turns out, things don’t always go the way you expect. I met Sean a couple of weeks into the TESOL course in Hua Hin, and we got to know each other talking in the halls on the course, on beach days, and nights out. On the day that I was leaving for my placement, we went on our first “date” and then had to say goodbye.
Sean was placed in Ang Thong Province, about an hour drive North of Bangkok, and I was placed in Hat Yai, in the far South. With the distance, I don’t think either of us expected that we would end up talking everyday. Like, all day…everyday.
After being apart for almost two months, we met up in Phuket with a group of friends. And that was it! We then did everything we could to see each other at least every two weeks. We met up in Hat Yai, Chiang Mai, Bangkok, Ang Thong and Malaysia throughout our placements. Once the semester came to an end, my parents came to visit, met my new, mysterious boyfriend, Sean, and we all travelled together for almost three weeks. We went back to Phuket, then to Koh Lanta, Krabi, and ended in Chiang Mai where Sean and I stayed for a while.
Fast-forward eight months, and we now live together in Newcastle in England, (Sean is British) and will be moving to Canada (I’m Canadian) in the summer later this year. I think I speak for both Sean and myself when I say Thailand, and the last year and a half, has not been what we expected. Lucky for us, it was more than we could have ever asked for.
Morgan and Darren
My name is Morgan. I’m 25 years old from Nova Scotia, Canada. I have wanted to be a teacher since I was a little girl so when I came to Thailand in April of 2016 to start the TESOL course through Xploreasia, I was beyond excited. Throughout the duration I was able to meet incredible souls from all over the world. I made great friendships with many other students in the program and made some especially close bonds with a smaller group. One of the people who made my experience truly special was a student from another group. His name was Darren and he was from Ireland.
Our two groups of friends often overlapped and so Darren and I became pretty close. We were busy with the course and had our own agendas but anytime we happened to be together we always had a really great connection. When the course finished, I left for my position in Lampang (Northern Thailand) and he went off to his position in Bangkok. We kept in touch and usually heard from each other a few times a week to check in on one another. From that, a few times a week became nearly every day. That quickly turned into every day, and soon we messaged back and forth every day for most of the day. For our first long weekend I went to Bangkok to meet my group of girlfriends from the course and ended up seeing Darren just as much as I saw everyone else. Soon I was going to Bangkok to visit him for the weekend and after a time, he came up to Lampang to visit. We now often talk about his first visit to Lampang. We went to dinner and talked for hours at a small local Riverside Restaurant.
We have said since then that visit is when things really blossomed into more than we ever thought or expected it would. A relationship was something both of us were actually quite against when we first came to Thailand. But at this point, we both knew this was something a lot bigger.
That was in August. It is now almost 6 months later and he is the first person I message in the morning and the last person I talk to at night. Though we are 8 hours away, he never fails to make me feel loved, supported and helps me stay positive when the distance drives me crazy. We laugh and go on ridiculous adventures. We support and encourage each other and challenge each other to always be our best as teachers.
It has been so amazing to me how two people from opposite corners of the world could have such an incredible bond. I feel so lucky to have been able to find a person I call my best friend and we can’t wait to see what the future holds for us and what adventures we will go on next.
Cameron and Janie
Cameron and I were both in the Hua Hin TESOL course for October 2015. Throughout the course, we became good friends: we lived across from each other, sat next to each other in class, and even worked as partners on the English camp day of the course.
Cameron was always optimistic and lighthearted, so he was a great person to have around during such a crazy time. We were disappointed when we were placed so far away from each other; I was moving down south to Songkhla and he was headed East to Trat province. Luckily though, our TESOL group remained close, and we were able to meet up several times throughout the next semester. Fast forward a few months, we both decided that while we weren’t ready to leave Thailand, we needed a change, and we individually decided to move to Phuket. Over the March/April break from school, we ended up traveling through Vietnam and northern Thailand together and some friends and the rest is history! 10 months later, we are both still teaching in Phuket and we are now planning our next adventure together in Canada.
Jamie and Amien
Amien and I met in Thailand and both participated in Xplore Asia but during different years. Amien had already been teaching in Phang Nga a full year before I arrived in 2013. Like all the classiest of love stories, we met at the only bar in our town (we taught at different schools). We started to spend every afternoon together and before you know it, every afternoon turned into a year. We had so much fun exploring Thailand from the islands in the South to the Mountains in the north. We also survived many visa runs together to Malaysia. Sitting next to someone on a bus for 16 hours and not wanting to kill them is a sign of true love.
After a little over a year, I returned back to the U.S (Austin, Texas) and Amien took a teaching job in China but we continued to Skype everyday. Amien came to Austin for awhile and then I met him in South Africa. However, we basically went months without seeing each other in person and it was hard (but worth it!). Finally in early 2016, Amien came to Austin and never left. Months later, Jamie and Amien tied the knot and are now married! Thailand completely changed our lives. It not only allowed us to find each other, but allowed us to focus on ourselves. I now work in People Operations at Google, and Amien is pursuing his dream of personal training (All that Muay Thai!) in Austin, Texas.
Our adventure continues beyond Thailand and I am forever grateful for this experience.
And Sometimes, Your Perfect Match is Just Your Best Friend!
Samantha and Lauren, Best Friends
The first month was pretty much a blur. We became extremely close very quickly. I held her hand while she sobbed into a burger at Burger King. She carried me across a street that was flooded (for her own benefit because she wanted fries that badly and didn’t want to go alone). But it wasn’t all rainbows and unicorns. We would bicker. We both had strong accents (Londoner, and Welsh) and we’d both get frustrated with each other when we couldn’t understand each other. But the bickering always turned into laughter and that’s how I knew she was special.
The day came when we found out where we would be placed. We were apart. My heart broke. Lauren is placed in Phuket, and I’m in Krabi! Well that perked us both up and we were only 3 hours apart by bus. I wanted her 3 minutes apart from me. We had spent so much time together that first month, I couldn’t imagine life without her frizzy hair bobbing along by my side.
The time came for us to part. There were tears, promises and a slideshow of photographs of our time together. One month later, we reunited in Bangkok and I have never felt excitement like it. Waiting for her to come through those doors. I started to freak whenever I saw someone with a mop of curly afro hair. Finally, she came through those doors. Of course, she filmed it. Never gets off social media but I’m glad she did. The cheesy smile on her face, and my screams whilst I jumped on her was priceless.
I spent Christmas with her in Phuket and we celebrated New Year together on the island of Koh Tao. She is yet to visit me in Krabi. We can see who wear the trousers in this relationship and who does all the running around! Even though we aren’t together, we speak on the phone nearly every day and she was there for me 100% when I had a bad time at the start of the course.
James and Thomas, Best Friends
We got roomed together in H2 in Bangkok and just hit off from there really. We unfortunately didn’t get placed together in Hua Hin…but thanks to the wonderful and handsome, Jon Harman favors were exchanged and strings were pulled which ultimately led me and Tom sharing a room together in BSP in Hua Hin. Things just escalated so quickly… Now he’s in Trang and I’m in Bangkok, but we’re trying to make the most of it. They say it’s better to have loved and lost, than to have never loved at all… I don’t regret any of my time with him.
I’ve been in Thailand for just about a month now, and I have finally moved to my placement in Trang City and found an apartment! But let me back up just a second real quick.
The past month in Chiang Mai has been the longest shortest time of my life. I feel like I’ve been here forever and I’ve known my TESOL friends forever, but at the same time the month of April flew by just as I was warned it would. Let me first say, I feel so fortunate for the group that I had the pleasure of taking my TESOL course with, as well as the wonderful XploreAsia staff that made transitioning into life in Thailand so welcoming and smooth. Having a group of only 22 people made it easy to become close quickly and develop significant relationships with every single person in my group. I’m already becoming homesick for Chiang Mai and missing my friends, but it’s good to know that I have people all over the country and I’m confident that we will all see each other again soon.
Without going into a crazy amount of detail, I want to try and briefly touch on some of the highlights of the past month:
Week one was orientation…if you haven’t already seen it, I posted a video compilation of a lot of what we did in just that week. We went to a rice plantation and planted rice, we took a muay thai lesson (Thai boxing), we got to visit Doi Suthep (a temple high up in the mountains of Chiang Mai), as well as a Tunnel Temple in Chiang Mai, and we took both Thai language and culture classes. The orientation activities began to ease us into realizing, yes we are actually in Thailand.
professional rice planters
Our first weekend, and our only real full weekend (we had some class on the weekends because of our songkran break), about 11 of us decided to go up North to Chiang Rai for the weekend. My friend, Aida, had been to this place called the Bamboo Nest before and highly recommended we go, even handling all the booking which made it really easy. We took the bus from Chiang Mai to Chiang Rai and then had a couple hours to walk around Chiang Rai city and check out the White Temple before getting picked up to go to the Bamboo Nest. The Bamboo Nest is probably the most beautiful place I’ve ever been to. It was up in the middle of nowhere, surrounded by mountains. We had the place at capacity with the 11 of us and three other travelers that were there. There were 2 people to each small bamboo ‘nest’ – they were made entirely of bamboo, each with a balcony and a bamboo hammock. It was just peaceful and serene and unlike anywhere I’ve ever been in my life. We decided to go on a hike with Noi, the man that works at Bamboo Nest and one of the nicest people I’ve ever met. He spoke perfect English which he learned solely through speaking with guests over the years. Noi led us through the jungle and showed us how to cook rice, chicken, and eggs simply using bamboo. After our hike we took a boat to a small village and got to walk around and see their very minimal way of living. After everything we said our goodbyes and headed back to Chiang Mai.
if only pictures could do it justice…
Later that following week was Songkran. I also posted a video compilation in my last post from Songkran because I can’t even begin to explain in words how much fun this holiday is. We got two days off of class for Songkran, the Thai new year, which we spent on the streets of Chiang Mai engaging in water gun fights with every man, woman, and child we came in contact with. It was even more fun than it sounds.
greatest people, greatest holiday
In our second to last week, we had three days set aside where we got to actually teach! Because that is why I’m here, isn’t it! I got paired up with my friend Alex and we came up with a lesson plan on superheroes and a lesson plan on snacks. We went to two different schools, one very small school where we had a class of about 5 boys, and then one massive school where we had around 40 kids per class. It was crazy to finally get in the classroom, and although it definitely proved tough I think that everyone did a really great job. We got to spend some classes teaching, and others observing which was helpful because I’m definitely stealing great ideas from everyone else’s lessons! I entirely lost my voice, and then developed a cough which I still have two weeks later, but it got me even more excited for what’s to come once I start teaching.
strong like hulk
The last major thing we got to do, which I planned literally week one, was to go to the Elephant Nature Park in Chiang Mai. Almost everyone in our group came, about 14 of us, and we got to feed, bathe, pet, and walk with rescued elephants at the park. This park in particular is really special in that they make their visitors aware of the maltreatment of elephants all over Thailand. People should not ride elephants, elephants are badly broken and beaten in order to use to make money and entertain tourists, as well as carry out manual labor. All of the elephants at the park are rescue elephants, some have missing ears, broken bones, holes in their ears from hooks, and many are blind. It was really horrible to see, but also amazing because the elephants at the park are free to roam wherever they like and are treated as they should be, with kindness and respect. They are such gentle and smart creatures and it was surreal getting to actually meet so many of them. The park also has many other rescue animals – dogs, cats, water buffalo, goats, etc. Everyone had an inspiring and incredible day and I highly recommend this particular place if anyone is in Thailand and wants to get a chance to really interact with elephants.
note her broken foot from being beaten by her previous owner
Finally, in our last week we had our exam and graduation (and a screening of the season premiere of Game of Thrones on our classroom projector – obviously equally important). I’m really excited about my placement, and I got incredibly lucky because my best friend Baylee got placed in the same school as me! I’ll give a full description of my placement city, my apartment, and my school in the next post!
watch out Trang, here we come!
Written by: Lauren Ellman
ESL Teaching in Rural Thailand – Nick Zeller
After a month-and-a-half long stint in the North of Thailand getting trained for ESL teaching and hopping around mountain towns, I finally ended up in a small village in Northeastern Thailand called Muang Khong. You might ask yourself where that is and try to google it. You won’t find much information online. Even an hour away from town I’ll tell people where I live an they’ll have no idea where I’m talking about. Oddly, Google already has Muang Khong on streetview if you know where to be looking (google is everywhere!). The town is about 5 hours Northeast of Bangkok in a large conglomeration of provinces in the East that everyone calls Isaan (there are like ten different ways to spell it).
Muang Khong and Isaan
Sunset over some rice paddies from a train just outside Muang Khong
Isaan has a few cities (Korat, Khon Kaen, Ubon), but it’s mostly flat farmland with rice paddies, their farmers, and small towns. This makes for some great sunsets, but doesn’t allow for many activities if one’s passions lie outside the wide world of agriculture. So this region (with a few exceptions) is not an undiscovered tourist destination waiting to happen, it’s a Kansas or an Iowa and only a few of the foreigners ever go outside Miami. Before I arrived, I was nervous that Muang Khong would be too rural, too flat, too small, and too far away from other foreigners for me to be happy. It is still rural, small, flat, and isolated, but I’ve been pleasantly surprised in what I’ve found to enjoy in all of that.
In just about everyone’s experience, Thais are naturally, and sometimes overwhelmingly, kind and generous. This quality is kicked into overdrive in Isaan. As a foreigner (Thais call us farang) teacher here, locals want to give you directions, help you get a good deal, make sure your food is delicious, and are very, very curious about you (although this usually boils down to four questions that I’ll get to later). Thai generosity has gotten me a free bicycle, more fresh fruit than I can count (or eat), dirt cheap motorcycle repair, last-minute rides to bus stations, several rounds of rice moonshine, and a road trip to a 5-hour Muay Thai extravanganza, just to name a few. Trying to reciprocate these favors is futile 99% of the time, which leads to some lingering grateful guilt that I don’t really fight anymore.
One of the fun (and occasionally creepy) aspects of being a foreign teacher in such a small community is that after a few weeks you achieve small-town celebrity status. I imagine it’s a similar feeling to being the new on-site reporter at a small-time local TV station. Regardless of where or when, if you come across a student outside of school, they will wave and yell some variation of “helloooooo teacher!” then giggle as if they have just done something exceptionally clever and silly. This has happened enough that now everyone in town knows I will answer/acknowledge when the word “teacher!” is directed at me. Especially in the evenings after school, my trips to the market or to dinner are filled with “helloooooo teacher!”s at regular intervals. Most of the time, this phenomenon is fun; everyone smiles and is friendly, I like that they want to interact with me, even if only for a few seconds, and it’s a good feeling when you’re walking down the street and everyone you pass wants to say hi! Other times it feels like the locals are those kids at the zoo that poke the glass to try and make the animal move: “If you yell ‘hello’ at the Farang, he’ll say something that sounds funny!”
School and ESL Teaching
Get stoked for directional vocabulary!
Teaching has been the best part of my time here so far. I teach 12-14 year olds for 5 periods a day (a little over 4 hours of actual class time). At the outset, I figured that since enthusiasm comes easily and I’ve been blessed with a 12-year-old’s sense of humor, teaching junior high would be pretty straightforward. My first week in the classroom was revealing. I found out pretty quickly it wasn’t going to be a breeze and my Robin-Williams-in-Dead-Poets-Society aspirations can be put out to pasture. Half of my classes have 35-45 kids in them, all with chairs and desks. The other half are double-classes with 70-90 students, all sitting on the floor. While there are some notable exceptions, 95% of my students have very, very low English proficiency. Kids in Muang Khong get instruction in grammar and written English (there is very little emphasis on speaking and conversation) from their Thai teachers, and those teachers often have poor English themselves. I’ll be the first native-speaker English teacher the M1s (12-13 y.o.) have had. Some of my twelve year olds can’t write their first names in English and even my oldest students have vocabularies limited mostly to nouns involving sports, animals, food, and the movies Frozen and Fast 7.
The smaller classroom
Thais have a deep-seated cultural aversion to the idea of ‘losing face,’ and this makes things harder for them and me. Unless there is candy involved, Thai kids hate to answer a question they aren’t absolutely sure about in front of the class. I’m learning to fight through this with a lot of games, group-work, praise, and goofiness. For instance, if you can demonstrate that your students can answer a question in groups of three students, that they’ll have some time to prepare their answer in their group, and that the class will applaud when they’re done, you might have some volunteers. If you just ask for raised hands, you’re dreamin.’ Buuuuut since the students have such limited English, demonstrating this to them becomes rather difficult. A vicious cycle.
Another feature of the Thai educational system is that I can’t fail any of my students. I know it and they know it. This is rarely a problem, but in every class there are a few students who make it plain that they have no interest in learning English or doing much work. In an American school, I could make it clear that they will fail and be held back if they don’t put in a bare minimum of effort, but in Thailand this an empty threat. I have no little recourse if a student doesn’t want to do an assignment or participate other than making the assignments and activities as engaging as possible. A lot of the Thai teachers simply don’t teach to these kids and leave them to their own devices in the back of the class, and sometimes I do the same so that the rest of the students can keep progressing. However, when we have time the solution seems to be games, games, and games. If you can bring out the competitive spirit long enough for the kids in the back to nail ten or twelve words of vocabulary, that’s a win.
Bicha and his son Bat working on combos. Note the set of dumbbells made of two paint cans filled with cement and an iron rod.
In the second week at school, the janitor/handyman introduced himself and asked me if I like boxing. I’ve never been terribly intrigued by boxing, but I wanted to make friends so I said yes. WIth no other explanation, he told me to meet him after school and drove me to the neighboring town about twenty minutes away. It turned out that his friend Bicha runs a Muay Thai boxing ‘gym’ out of his front yard as a side-gig. This guy is pure rural Thailand: he smokes like a chimney, doesn’t speak a lick of English, and makes dirty jokes about you in Thai when he doesn’t think you’re hitting hard enough. He has two sons, (I think 16 and 17, definitely still in high school), who are both absolute lunatics with a pair of boxing gloves, and Bicha himself was a good fighter in his own right back in whatever decade was his heyday (he could be anywhere from 35-60).
Video of Bat’s kicks. Watch with sound
Muay Thai (thai-style martial art in which kicking, punching, elbows, knees, and wrestling are all allowed) has grown on me and I’ve been going every day after school for the past three weeks. Since no one speaks much English to give me instructions, I fall in behind Bicha’s sons and do what they do. The routine is generally a half hour running session (which is the most brutal part since it’s usually 90+ in the sun), followed by stretching, shadow-boxing, and hitting the punching bags. Then we go into the ring one at a time with Bicha and work through combinations with pads, followed by some sort of conditioning drill on the punching bags. The session always ends with the two boys doing ungodly amounts of situps, laughing at me as I try, sweatily, desperately clinging to my last shreds of dignity, to keep up.
Meeting the local 5:0
We showed up to school one Wednesday and were told that we wouldn’t have classes in the afternoon. Then, a little before lunchtime, we were updated that the reason we were excused from classes was that we were going to be teaching the local police force. The end of the lesson was a question and answer section in which the other English teacher and I were speaking on behalf of Western civilization. Most of the questions were things like “do westerners feel uncomfortable when we call them farang?” and “why is it bad to ask a woman how old she is?” The highlight was “if I meet a French person, will they expect me to kiss them on both cheeks?”
- Thai is a tonal language, so there are lots of words with the same sounds and different tones that all sound identical to me. The word bpaed can mean ‘eight,’ ‘duck,’ or ‘spicy’ depending on the tone you use, which can get very confusing at restaurants when the waiter keeps insisting that they don’t have duck even though you’re just trying to ask if one of their dishes is spicy.
- There are four questions I always get asked, almost always in this order with widely varying levels of very creative Thanglish:
- “Where are you from?”
- “What are you doing in Isaan?”
- “Do you have a girlfriend/boyfriend?” (Cue shock and awe noises)
- “Have you eaten rice yet?” (This is akin to asking someone how they are doing, but it translates to “have you eaten rice yet.” I’m still not sure whether people are asking me how I’m doing or whether I’m hungry in different situations).
- I bought a scooter for 3,000 baht (a little under $90). The school janitor helped me pick it out, so I was pretty convinced I had gotten away with a steal when I got it home from the shop without any problems. Of course the next time I tried to ride it, the kick-start snapped right off and had to be welded back on, the exhaust pipe had something stuck in it, and the headlight wasn’t working. But four hours and $3.50 to the mechanic later and she runs like a dream.
Just a man, his switch, and the respect of everyone within a hundred foot radius
I wish I had a better picture to do this guy justice. This man is the head disciplinarian/PE teacher at Muang Khong High. All the young teachers love him and call him ‘papa.’ At any school gathering he can be seen walking around with his bamboo switch, a smile on his face and a whistle in his mouth. I’ve never seen him actually use the switch, but no teacher commands more respect/fear than he does among the students. Every morning the students gather to sing the national anthem and do announcements You can always tell where papa is because the students around him are singing louder than anyone else. In another life, he would have been great as a beneficent dictator maintaining an iron grip over a small, resource-rich nation-state. For now he just whistles at kids for being late and talking during announcements.
- About three weeks into my stay here, I started getting these little bug bite-looking itchy red spots on my shoulders and arms. WebMD had me convinced they were bedbugs, one of the Thai teachers told me I was allergic to the papaya salad we had had earlier in the week, and the doctor at the hospital assured my that he didn’t know so he just gave me some antihistamines. A few days later I went to a clinic with a different doctor and he told me I was just having a reaction to the extreme heat. Turns out I’m literally allergic to this place.
- Thai first names are a mouthful (Nathawat, Panintorn, Durmklang), so everyone has a nice short nickname to make things easy. For an English-speaker, these get pretty funny. There are a lot of Nats, Kats, Oms, etc. My favorites so far (I wish I had pictures) are Boss, a tiny, over-enthusiastic 12 year old with a penchant for asking for high-fives at very inconvenient times and a borderline obese, round-faced, jolly 14 year-old named Turbo. The English program director’s deputy is named Manoon Moonboom, which is also pretty cool.
Here, I’ve been asked to give a lesson on impromptu lesson on “the importance of punctuality” for a morning homeroom. The Thai teacher does not look pleased with my work.
Most of the time, it’s sort of shocking that Thailand has a functioning education system. Everything changes at a moment’s notice, no one ever seems to know the full story, things are at least ten minutes late, and no one stops to think “maybe if we tweaked a few things, this could go a lot smoother.” In this sort of environment, no two days at school are ever the same. We’re often asked to teach some special class or help out with another teacher’s lesson at a moment’s notice. Getting comfortable with freestyling lessons as you go is probably the single most important skill I’ve picked up here.
That’s all I have for now. Thanks for reading this far down! Next time: in which Nick joins a small-time Muay Thai entourage.
Nick graduated our Chiang Mai TESOL course in April 2015. Nick is a Colorado native and a somewhat recent graduate of Colby College. He got a little too comfortable living in DC and figured taking his talents to a different hemisphere was a good way to fix that. He likes mountains, rugby, anything with taro in it, students who prefer fistbumps to high fives, and chicken-on-a-stick. He will never understand Austin’s obsession with toasties, despite his best efforts. He’s a big fan of Thailand, the Thais, and being a teacher here and he totally thinks you should give it a shot.
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Moving On to Bigger Things
Monday was working 9-7 in an office. Tuesday was working 9-7 in an office doing coffee runs for survival. Wednesday up until Friday was me sitting in front of a computer screen from 9-7, casually getting interrupted by other unhappy colleagues arguing with the boss. The ratio of week days to weekend never made sense to me. My weekends were crazy and spontaneous, travelling up and down the east coast of Australia. But before I knew it, I was back in front of my computer screen, enclosed in a small room.
I was scrolling through the net one day, (I say the net because you know how you’re on one website and after about fifty clicks on random things and an hour later, you’ve ended up somewhere completely off track?), I came across something along the lines of “Teach In Thailand!” First of all, I had no idea where Thailand even fell on the map and secondly, I was a horrid student. Potentially putting up with someone like me was not on my bucket list, but still I found myself clicking on the link and filling in my details.
It was the next day I received a call from a woman who would help me for the next few months planning my trip to Thailand.
I received my visa, quit my job, turned twenty, gave over half of my wardrobe to my lovely, Brazilian flatmate, and my cute but psycho (no not me) cat, Blaze, ran away which was perfect timing if you ask me.
Sitting on the edge of my bed with my mother who had flown over from New Zealand to say goodbye, life decided then and there that it would throw a brick at me. That brick would be my very first anxiety attack. I couldn’t breathe, every little worry that I didn’t think was there before, or at least hid very well, was screaming at me. Mum throws her arms around me and is repeatedly saying, “It’s ok, just breathe.”
Bangkok, an overwhelming city of discovery.
Not even half a day later I arrive in Bangkok airport. Of all places for a twenty year old girl who has just had an anxiety attack to go, SHE GOES TO BANGKOK? It’s almost like I was begging for another episode.
I meet up with the small group of other people who have given up their lives in other parts of the world to do this. After just one hectic night together on the streets of Bangkok, I can say I honestly felt happy, excited and most of all my mind was free of bad thoughts.
We study, party, learn, explore, meditate and even at times cry together. Then I get the news that I got offered an ESL teaching job, even though I hadn’t graduated with my TESOL certificate yet.
I take it.
I cry as I hug my friends goodbye and jump on board a bus that will drive for ten hours to reach my new home; Trang, located in the southern part of Thailand.
Starting Out as an ESL Teacher
Adventures in Trang
Don’t ever expect something when going into unfamiliar grounds. I thought I was going to be able to chill out, explore my new town, make some friends maybe. Wrong. Oh, how wrong I was. They threw me into the school almost as soon as I put my feet down on Trang soil. Like, Eden, don’t catch your breath just yet. My new job was teaching 6-12 year old, Mini English Program Students English and Art at Anuban Trang School. Mini English Program basically is a segregated part of the school where students learn most of their subjects in Thai AND English, of course at a bigger cost. My agents take me in, I meet a few of the other foreign teachers and then I get given my timetable which shows that I have five classes to teach that day. I’m thinking great, I can go home and prepare lesson plans for these classes next week. Wrong again. So, so wrong. I am told I have to begin teaching straight away, no lesson plans. Just wing it basically. I think I muttered a “Are you being serious?” There I was, standing in front of this class of seven year olds, in a country where Thai is their first language and me not knowing what they even know about English or Art.
In all seriousness, I don’t know where I pulled it from, but I fully aced teaching this class. We’re going over fruits. I’m drawing. I’m asking them what it is. They’re all yelling the answer at me. I say “Are you sure? I think it’s a banana.” They’d respond, “Noooooo, Teacher! Apple! Apple!” We’re laughing and joking and learning. My agents are sitting there with massive grins on their faces. They don’t even stay for the whole lesson. They’re just like yeah, this girl’s got it.
That day a South African woman from my school, whom I would become very good friends with, side saddled me on the back of her bike and we rode to my new apartment. I was shown about five different places that I could move into. One place had a major ant infestation, another was so dark and gloomy I felt like the sun had disappeared. Of course it wasn’t until the fifth one was shown to me that I had decided, yes. This is the one. It was a brand new modern apartment with a huge room already furnished with a king sized bed, table and chairs, television, vanity, wardrobe and fridge. Off from that room was a bathroom with a modern toilet and a hot shower. The apartment building had free parking, 24 hour surveillance cameras operating, big security gates and my favourite; FREE WIFI. Obviously I decided to pay more for the luxury of all these things. I was well aware of cheaper accommodation but I knew that it meant bucket showers and squat toilets which I hadn’t quite yet accustomed myself to.
The best thing about teaching ESL in Thailand? The students.
Soon enough I get myself into a really good rhythm at school. (Wait, do I call it school or work? I don’t know.) I planned my lessons according to the textbooks the students have. They’re great. One topic will generally last a few weeks. One of my favourite topics in English I did with my P4 students was Emergency Services. Teaching them what to do in the event of a house fire, doing role plays with each other with one acting as someone who has an emergency and the other acting as the phone operator for the emergency services. We even did a few classes on Tsunamis, which really interested them because they all knew about the 2004 Indian Ocean tsunami that hit Thailand. At the end of this topic one of the other foreign teachers organised for the local Fire Fighters to come into school and speak to the students, they had the best time.
The feeling you get from giving your own knowledge to someone who takes it in willingly and appreciates it is completely overwhelming. I never realised how extremely lucky I was knowing the English language. Thai’s know that English is the key to so many opportunities and that’s why they’re eager to learn it. No one should be denied the right to be educated, so I think it’s wonderful that there are so many foreign teachers leaving their western lives to pass on their own knowledge to these beautiful people.
Having a great time in Phuket.
When I wasn’t working I was off exploring the country. Like any other twenty year old would do, of course I headed to Phuket. Where of course I partied for days until I literally was lying on the floor of the backpackers exhausted like “Help me”. I got that help alright, helped onto the boat to Phi Phi Island where I partied even more except I had a bloody brilliant beach to fall flat onto.
I got to experience high-end shopping in Bangkok, Songkran in Chiang Mai, blessings of a Monk in Phuket, snorkeling in Phi Phi Island, amazing/endless market shopping in Songkhla, cricket eating in Hua Hin. Just endless amounts of new experiences and fun.
Looking Back at Life as an ESL Teacher
Looking back at Teaching ESL in Thailand
In March 2015 my teaching came to an end. Unfortunately visas can get difficult and you need to make sacrifices. I have returned to New Zealand where I am going to begin university. It was such a hard decision for me, but I know that once I get my degree I can return to Thailand and teach once more. The relationship I built with my students, my 6-7 year olds in particular gave me feelings I had never had before. I left them begging me to stay, crying, tugging at my skirt. I miss them every single day and I love them like they’re my own. Teaching in Thailand is by far the best decision I ever made and it makes me so excited for my life ahead. I mean, i’m almost 21, and I feel like I’ve already accomplished such a huge thing in my life. I will always encourage people to never settle for a life they know is too small for them. Get out there. Try something new. Go somewhere you haven’t been before. Offer all that you have to give to someone who wants and needs it. I promise you will feel richer than the man with the most money in the world.
Eden Le Comte
Eden is Australian born, and lived in New Zealand most of her life. She grew up in a squash orientated family but I broke herself away from it after realising it wasn’t what she wanted to do for the rest of her life.
Eden has a lust for travel, adventure and throwing herself in the deep end.
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Fight or Flight?
IN ALL OF US there are two fears that are constantly fighting each other: one, the fear of scary, risky, unfamiliar unknowns; and two, the fear of getting too comfortable in one place and missing out on a life well-spent.
It is the fight between our need for safety, security and familiar things and our want for new, exciting experiences worthy of telling your grandchildren—the nine-to-five desk job in the city versus the nine-to-whatever job in paradise, the shiny new briefcase versus the dirty old backpack, the low buzz of repetitive weekends out at the bars versus the constant, electrifying adrenaline high of adventure in strange new lands.
Hanging out with my family back home.
Three months before I graduated college I had no idea what I wanted to do with my life. Not many of my friends did either. The fight between fears was playing loud inside my head… Should I move to the city and begin a career, or should I buy a plane ticket, fly to the other end of the world, and see what it’s all about?
I bought the ticket.
It’s been almost three months since I moved to Thailand. I haven’t been this happy since I was just a wide-eyed little kid who got away with eating pillowcases full of candy and pooping his pants at the zoo. In many ways, I have become that kid again… I am completely taken in by the magic of the world; I live in a constant state of surprise, fascination and curiosity; I am learning things about myself that only new experiences and challenges can provide; and I am always excited about what’s happening here, now, and whatever the future might hold (but I swear I don’t poop my pants anymore.)
So, why Thailand? I’m twenty-three years old, fresh out of college with a fancy piece of paper hanging on my bedroom wall that says I’m a Bachelor of Journalism or something… why not put that to good use?
I wanted to become a better person—a more compassionate, patient, responsible, fearless, open-minded, hopeful, happy citizen of the world—and this I would achieve by forcing myself outside my comfort zone and into unfamiliar territory, into a culture totally unlike my own, surrounded by people who think and talk differently than I do.
I wanted to help push the world in the right direction—and this I would achieve by teaching English.
How I Started Teaching English in Thailand
The XploreAsia Songkran crew, Hua Hin.
My journey as a Foreign English teacher began with XploreAsia. For one month I lived in Hua Hin with close to a hundred other people from all over the world… my whole life I had been surrounded by mostly midwestern Americans, ate mostly midwestern American food and drank mostly midwestern American beer… I was, mostly, a midwestern American.
By the time I left Hua Hin I was a changed person. I had gained more than just a certification to teach. I gained a new, exhilarating confidence. I gained new perspectives and a deep respect for the awesome glory of the world around me. I gained life-long friends.
And I’m still changing every single day.
Some of my high school students in Thailand.
For two months I’ve been teaching English to high schoolers in a small southern town called Thung Song. Everything about the town is totally, magnificently authentic. If I wake up early enough in the morning and open my bedroom window, I can hear beautiful Buddhist chants floating down on a cool breeze from a temple silhouetted on the horizon. The rush-hour traffic on the road outside my house consists of smiley teenagers zipping by on motor scooters, curious dogs, fidgety little roosters and giant bulls being herded from one patch of muddy grass to another.
The locals have shattered my once long-held belief that Minnesotans are the friendliest people on the planet.
This is my view every morning at school. This is why I’m here, incredible.
Several times throughout the school day I am hit with intense bursts of gratitude and peacefulness. My students and co-workers have accepted me as their own. They appreciate me and respect me. They want to be my friend. Walking through the hallways, I smile and laugh and give out so many high-fives it damn-near hurts my face and hands.
Three months ago my family and I said our goodbyes at the airport. I hugged them, threw on my backpack and blew a teary-eyed kiss from behind the row of conveyor belts and body scanners.
I started walking. To where was I walking, and why? A better me, a better life, a better world? Yes—but the paths we walk and the destinations for which we are bound ultimately cannot be seen. I was walking with that mantra humming somewhere in the back of my mind—a better me, a better life, a better world—but there was one thing burning white hot in my heart, driving me faster and further than any pretty-sounding humble idea can do; and that is the desire to go—the desire to get off your ass, throw yourself into the winds of the world, and make some memories—go! All we can do is just go.
And that’s exactly what I did.
Michael is a 23-year-old graduate of Iowa State University. He has served as a reporter for the Iowa State Daily, as a writer for Ethos magazine and as Co-Editor-In-Chief of SIR, a student-run men’s magazine.
His latest project, Eyes of an Expat, is an ongoing collection of stories about his adventures abroad.
A New Beginning
“Fifteen minutes until boarding,” the calm, collected stewardess said over the intercom. I slumped down in the hard airport chair, grinding my knuckles into my 3:00 AM eyelids. Outside the giant windows Seattle rain fell over the dark runway. I stared at the massive plane waiting to take me 13 hours and 9763.6 km around to the other side of the world.
A million thoughts fired in my head all at once:
What if we can’t find jobs? What if something goes wrong with our visas? What if we’re flying to a meticulously-orchestrated scam? What if I quit my comfortable, secure, perfectly-mediocre job to move to a country that has just undergone a military coup, and we end up in an uncharted village being torn apart by savage cannibals!?
Oh come on, I’ve never been to Thailand before…
Fourteen minutes, still plenty of time to run back out through security, hail a taxi to the nearest hotel, and call my boss to beg for my job back.
I squeezed my girlfriend’s hand. She didn’t respond. We had spent the last week packing our entire lives into suitcases, cleaning the most foreign areas of our apartment, and changing every address on every paper trail, all the while waiting for the perfect moment to collapse over into a much needed coma-like sleep.
Lucky woman had gotten the jump on me, I thought with a smirk.
Every taped piece of cardboard and signed address redirect form had led to this big moment of shuffling in and out of relative’s cars, getting stuck in traffic, and then trudging nervously through a quiet airport.
I exhaled a long breathe, thinking—
It really hadn’t been that difficult at all.
In my head, I tried to piece together every factor in my life that had lead me to this terminal, like stitching threads of a disassembled map together.
I had been traveling to other countries before, an experience that had left me with an insatiable craving for new tastes, melodies, perspectives, and cultures.
I had a passion for language, all languages. I even had enough passion for the English language to devote four years of studying to it.
FFX – Looks a bit like the south of Thailand eh?
Final Fantasy X—weird I know, but the world in which that game takes place was modeled after Southeast Asia. I can’t help but think that on some subconscious level, the endless of hours I had plugged into playing through the lush tropical environments in that game had influenced me towards a future in Thailand.
Oh, how I would miss that game. Did they play video games in Thailand? Probably not like in America.
There was also the fear of being locked in a vicious nine to five cycle, stuck in the burbs in my early twenties, already signing off on my retirement package.
“Ladies and Gentleman we would like to start the boarding process,” a voice sounded from the intercom again.
I took another deep breath. Maybe trying to define the motivation behind this move wasn’t any less stressful than cataloging every possible crisis that could occur.
My girlfriend awoke, and we boarded the plane together, the first step in our upcoming adventure.
A Teacher in Thailand
With Krissy in Koh Chang
So far, the nine months my girlfriend and I have spent in Thailand has been a whirlwind of fun, culture shock, challenge, and responsibility.
Being one of five foreigners in the beautiful rural town of Phukieo, Chaiyaphum, I’ve learned to deal with things like loneliness, prejudice, homesickness, and the constant feeling that someone is staring at me (I always feel like somebodies watching me…). Dealing with these negative experiences however, has been a necessary sacrifice for me to experience the humbling hospitality, gratitude, respect, and endless supply of home-made Thai-food I’ve enjoyed from the same rural town.
I went from not using my English degree at all, dealing with sales quotas, emails, and a boss that never seemed to be impressed no matter how many more sales I put in the books, to dealing with mid-term test submission deadlines, communication failures, behaviorally challenged classes with fifty plus students, and the pressure of trying to fit into a work culture that is vastly different than my own.
The head of our English department gave me some home-made green curry and noodles…mm, mmmm
I could lie and write that the entire experience has been a rose colored box of new-born puppies wrapped in sunshine. The truth however, is that the road from my life in Seattle, to my life in rural Essan has been a chaotic and challenging one. It has been a timeline of joyous new experiences mixed with moments of inexpressible frustration.
From working with XploreAsia in the city of Hua Hin, bonding with like-minded individuals from all over the world and learning how to be an effective teacher in Thailand, to being the only foreigner at a Thai wedding for which I didn’t know the bride and groom, the experience has been humbling.
Conversing with my students, co-workers, and the local people has allowed me to see the similarities and differences between my culture in America and the culture here in Northeast Thailand. This experience has not only allowed me to better understand the things that are important in my culture, but also the things that are important to people all over the world.
Working in such a different environment has imbued me with the power to harness an inner calmness, or as the Thai’s say, a jai yen (cool heart), even during the most stressful and chaotic situations.
The tasks I manage everyday: making a fool of myself in front of classes of fifty teenagers who only partially understand me, stumbling through awkward communications in a language polar opposite to my own, and navigating the bus system and chaotic roadways of Thailand, has given me a self confidence that I never knew in the past. A self confidence that is reinforced every time one of my students shows progress, or thanks me for explaining a new concept to them. A self confidence that is reinforced every time one of the teachers at my school smiles and invites me to lunch, or drops a coffee at my desk because they respect me for who I am, and the effort that I put into my teaching. A self confidence that is reinforced every time the town fruit vendor drops an extra piece of pineapple in my bag because their child came home from school feeling more confident about their English skills.
Part of living in Thailand is making friends with elephants!
Sharing a tiny studio apartment with my girlfriend, there are things I miss though. There’s no hot water, we don’t have a television (no Playstation!), I can’t crank my electric guitar up to 11, I can’t escape off to the city of Seattle to indulge in the nightlife, and our air conditioner is a moody machine continually deciding to take a break every time the weather goes over 88 degrees Fahrenheit. But with the absence of these comforts, I have been able to prioritize my free time to allow myself to focus on the hobbies and goals that I find most important, free of the distractions that had disrupted my concentration in the past.
I have used my free time to continue my musical studies, focus on my writing, and develop new teaching resources. Not only has the absence of the aforementioned comforts allowed me to focus my time and talents, but it has also allowed me to develop a greater appreciation for those past comforts. It has allowed me to see firsthand that the seemingly inherent comforts a large majority of people in America enjoy, can easily be taken for granted.
Living in Thailand has allowed me to experience things, and mature in ways I have always wanted to. I’ve seen opulent temples, and gorgeous beaches. I have walked the streets of a sprawling city with over 12 million people. I’ve even made friends with elephants.
I am a stronger person with increased self-confidence. I am an accomplished educator, and scholar of the English language. Being in Thailand has given me the time and tools to absolve myself of the previous distractions that had kept me from working towards my personal goals. I have almost completed the second draft of my full-length novel. I am a better jazz pianist, classical guitarist, and music theorist. I am multi-lingual, and I have learned to forge relationships and prosper in a culture that is completely foreign to my own.
One of my classes, always willing to pose for a photo!
I know now, that nine months ago, standing in the terminal at Seatac airport, I had nothing to fear. That every challenge I would endure would be paralleled by a rewarding, and irreplaceable experience. That my time in Thailand would be one of immense personal growth greater than any Playstation game, secure 8-5, or 4O1K plan anywhere else.
Justin is currently teaching a second term at a school in Phukieo, Thailand. He graduated from the TESOL course last October with his girlfriend, Krissy. He’s having an incredible experience in Thailand and is a passionate educator.
Justin is one of our featured writers in the field, keep up to date with his progress on his personal blog.